Traitor
by AnadoraBlack
Summary: The war between Morgana Pendragon and her brother King Arthur is raging. The High Priestess gathers a force of druids to shun her brother out, and one in particular catches her eye. Asah, with her golden eyes and naive character, will become a powerful pawn... [Set before and during series 5]
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Hello everyone! I am back from a long hiatus during which I tried to get ahold of my book and writing, but I could not stay away from fanfictions for long. Here is my latest creation, once again paying hommage to a series I am still missing four years after its last episode. And I want to pay hommage to one man in particular who left for a better place not so long ago, and without whom my favourite character would not have had the same taste. Sir John Hurt, voice of Kilgharrah, the Great Dragon._

 _For now, enjoy the first two chapters. This fic will be different than anything else I've ever written._

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 1**_

* * *

The five figures were advancing in-between the trees, dark cloaks shielding their faces from view. Two forms were definitely smaller and thinner than the others. They belonged to a young woman and a small boy she was pulling forward as they strode onwards.

They were in a hurry, late to a gathering that would redefine their fates for the century to come. They had been summoned from all corners of the kingdom, young, old, men, women...only some had answered the call, but their mission was set.

The young woman quickened her pace as her blood hummed in her vains at the proximity of her kin. She was born with magic, you see, and the ink adorning her biceps was a brand that put her - and her companions - in extreme danger.

"Asah, slow down!" came the plea of the child. She looked down at the ten-year-old and calmed her frantic pace. He was red in the face for having walked for so long, and she couldn't help but pass a hand through the tendrils of dark brown hair that shadowed his eyes.

"We are almost there, Seth."

He sighed and glanced at their companions. The oldest, a gentle man who had been the healer of their tribe, smiled at the child and handed him a canteen before turning to the girl. "The boy needs rest."

"We all do, Kunar," she answered, pointedly staring at poor Jaly who was leaning against a tree, his pale skin looking almost blue in the light of dawn. "I can feel them close."

The older man nodded gravely. Among their group, Asah had been the guide, the protector, her powers keeping men and beasts alike at bay. Despite her young age, she was respected by her peers.

Once Seth had drunk his fill, the group of five started again at the renewed speed. Asah led them deeper in the forest, blood singing that other magical beings were near.

It took them another three hours to reach the gathering. All five stepped into a crowded clearing where people from all origins were scurrying around. Seth stepped away from Asah to run to his cousins, who had seen him arrive. At the same moment, a man without age with a triskell inked on his cheek walked up to her and assessed her form.

"I am Hector, leader of the Northern tribe."

Asah pulled down her hood and the sun that had started shining in the sky set her hair on fire, their bright orange mirrored in her amber eyes. "My name is Asah, from the East."

The man looked her up and down again, then reached out to her with his mind, the way only magical beings could converse.

" _You were born with magic._ " She nodded, and he gasped softly. " _Come. They will want to see you._ " Hector gently took her arm and led her forward.

Asah sent a silent plea to Kunar who nodded before going to join Seth, who was after all still in their charge.

Hector led her through lines and lines of tents until they reached the end of the clearing. Asah recognized some faces, either from neighbouring tribes or trading groups, but most of the crowd she did not recognize. Their purpose had indeed reached all corners of Albion.

There was a circle of elders on this side of the camp. Asah was led to them and a cacophony of voices erupted in her head at once. They were greeting her with a reverence she was not used to.

" _The child,_ " one was saying, " _she will help us._ "

" _She is too young,_ " was arguing another.

" _She is powerful,_ " counter-argued yet another.

Asah stepped forward, chin up in defiance. " _I will help._ "

And old woman who was facing her smirked, her wrinkled face taking a frightful look. She switched to normal speech, a crone-like vibrato escaping her chapped lips. "What will you help us do, child?"

Asah dared snarl at the elderly woman. "I will free our High Priestess. If it is the last thing I do."

The crone's smile widened. She was satisfied.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N:I just wanted to quickly add that the first three chapters are slightly shorter because I wrote them with ink and paper. And I am doing that more often now, it's much more agreeable than just the keyboard._

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 2**_

* * *

The bright-haired girl was zigzagging through the crowd, her cloak grazing the ground beneath her. People warily watched her pass, eyes squinting, sometimes flinching away.

Asah had agreed to this rescue mission before she had even been told what it all entailed. And now she knew, she was even prouder to be who she was. A witch. A sorceress. A powerful one too, the elders had said.

Truth be told, she ignored the extent of her own abilities. She used some spells and curses instinctively, but had never learnt other, more complex ones. She was in dire need of a teacher, a good one. And the High Priestess was the teacher she desperately needed.

Asah, apprentice of Morgana, daughter of the dragon. She had to admit it had a really good sound to it.

The only catch to her plan, however, was that ever since she had defied the elders, most druids avoided her like the plague. Only wise old Kunar and young Seth didn't seem unphased by her actions.

The elders, in the druids community, were considered untouchable, their word unquestionable. Asah, with her sorceress' arrogance, had always refused to answer to people who were not blessed with magic, but now she tasted the bitter sting of rejection for the first time.

Realising she had reached her destination, Asah shook off her thoughts, and snatched the arm of the running boy she had been seeking.

Seth' wide smile as he played with his cousins barely dimmed when he saw her, and he exclaimed a toothy 'Asah' before hugging her waist briefly.

She smiled at the boy. "Hello Seth. I've come to say goodbye..."

The grin faded. "Oh. So soon?" She nodded. "What am I going to do then?"

Asah chuckled at the child's antics. "You'll be fine, Seth. Kunar will take care of you until your father arrives."

Seth had been in her care for three months by then, his father Sorh having left the tribe to fight their useless King's war. But now Cenred was dead, Sorh could come back to his child. And as much as Asah had appreciated taking care of the boy, she would be happy to be on her own for a while. She was not sure she was made to be a mother...

Seth nodded with the hint of a smile, but still hugged her tightly. "I will miss you."

She smiled. "I will miss you too little one." Then she gently pushed him away and straightened her cloak on her shoulders as she strode to the group of men who waited under the cover of trees.

Hector acknowledged her presence with a nod. "Asah." She nodded back once, and he turned to the rest of the group. "We will reach The Pit in the night. We shall be swift, and free our Lady as quickly as possible. Our sorcerers," he looked pointedly at Asah and a youngish man with wheat blonde hair, "will free Morgana and the rest of us will take care of the scum who dared imprison her." His lips turned up in a snarl and several others growled in answer.

Asah felt strangely empowered when they started into the woods. She was part of a rescue party that would finally bring her the knowledge she lacked. There was no doubt in her mind that the Lady Morgana would teach her everything she needed.

The other supposedly sorcerer was walking next to her, dirty blue eyes darting to her now and then. After a while, he opened his mind and breathed " _Were you really born with magic?_ "

Asah locked her flaming amber eyes on the other and smirked, chin held up in pride. " _I was. My grandmother was a Dragonlord._ " Her peer gasped, and she felt a pleasant tingle up her spine. Truth be told, no one really knew if Almara had really been a Dragonlord, but her legend was well-known among Asah's tribe and she used this filiation to the best of her abilities.

" _Who have you studied with?_ " he asked next, and this had her grit her teeth. She did not want to admit she had not studied magic yet, not to him, not to anyone. So instead, she pretexted having heard a suspicious noise ahead, and ended this short conversation.

Light slowly faded over the group, and as night settled above their heads, a strange silence took hold of the men. Eyes darted left and right in seach of a foe, the quiet caress of cloth over grass or earth the only sound apart from the scurrying of rodents and owls.

Hector turned to Asah an hour after nightfall, and he beckoned both her adn the blonde man to a different path than the others. Up ahead, she could see the flickering of torches and could hear the loud boisterous laughter of the barbaric men they were seeking.

Once upon a time, the druid folk were called 'Picts' and they had been renowned for their ability to kill in utter silence, swift as a shadow and fleeting like the wind. There was no doubt in anyone's mind the loud bastards would pay their offense with their lives.

Closer and closer Hector and his two companions crept, and as they reached the line of trees, he reached for them in mind.

" _There it is. The Pit. Can you feel our Lady's presence?_ "

Asah surely could. As strong as a heartbeat, but as low as a whisper. The blonde sorcerer - she would never know his name - hissed sharply. " _She has been drugged. Chained to her own powers._ "

Hector nodded. " _Do not fret: they will pay._ " He paused and assessed the scene. " _Let's wait for the signal._ "

Asah's eyes went forward to the strange camp they had come to raid. Wooden barracks were scattered around the place as someone had hurried to build them, and some larger place between two of those was currently occupied by a large fire from which rose the scent of meat. A little away but heavily guarded stood the remnants of a well, a pile of ivy-covered stone marking its entrance. The Pit. A well-known prison, feared by all. But not that night.

An owl cry came loud from their left, and the loud celebration faded into a tense atmosphere. Some of their foes grabbed their weapons, others went to check the edge of the woods. The moment one stepped too close though, he was snatched close by a moving shadow, and without a sound, he disappeared.

At the same time, the men in the camp shouted orders at each other, and as expected, most of them hurried to the trees, unsuspecting the three sorcerers who had received their signal.

Hector moved as silently as a breeze through grass and stone, followed by the two younger and more eager druids. The closer they got to the Pit, the stronger the throb of magic was.

Behind them, their companions still distributed death and pain, shielding them from pryind eyes with the constant screams of their opponents.

As they reached the pile of rubble, Hector's eyes flashed a dangerous gold, snapping a chain that lay heavily, closing a rusty lid over the make-shift prison.

"HEY!" came the warning soon after, and a broad man with a wide battle-axe erupted from behind the pile of fallen stones, an angry growl exiting his lips as he launched himself at Hector.

Asah had never seen battle before. The little fights between boys in her tribe barely counted, and the sight of the two men throwing everything they had at each other was a sight to behold.

Every swirl of the axe was countered by an invisible shield as Hector lifted a hand and slurred ancient words that his eyes glow. For a moment he countered, but as two other men hurried their way, he turned to his peers and hissed "Go!" before throwing a curse so powerful the first man was forced to his knees, arm trapped against his chest as he collapsed in pain.

Asah's blonde kin shook off his daze before she did and sprang to his feet just as another guard tried to slice his head off. Asah pulled herself free from the scene and climbed on top of the stones, her hand playing and her amber eyes flashing as she wrenched the grate off the top of the well.

A whimper came from under and as she peaked down, a ball of fire casting a light from her fingers, Asah let out a cry of surprise. She could definitely see a human form at the bottom - dark and slender - but all her thoughts were on the pure white being coiled on itself.

A dragon!

Asah could not believe her eyes but did not have time to ponder. Stretching her mind, she reached the weak sorceress she had come to save. " _My Lady!_ " she said, and the form moved in surprise, " _I am Asah, and I am here to let you out._ "

There was a silence before the deep and alluring voice of Morgana Pendragon rose in her mind. " _You have magic._ " She did not expect an answer, and Asah could see her rise to her feet, a hand going to the dragon's head as if to awaken it. " _Well let me out then!_ "

Asah was entranced by the strange charisma that this slender form exuded, but as an arm closed around her waist and roughly pulled her aside, she barely had time to stare. The man who had caught her cursed in her face and lifted a hand to slap her, but a flash of gold eyes later, he had been thrown onto the stone, a deafening crack making it eerily certain he had broken his spine.

This time Asah acted quickly. Producing a rope from under her cloak, she threw it into the Pit and summoned her strength to haul Morgana from below. It took less than a minute before long, flowing dark hair appeared, framing an intensely beautiful face in which shone icy blue eyes.

Those eyes locked on Asah, who felt little for the first time in her life. "Aithusa. She needs to be freed as well."

Asah dared not ask how a dragon could not fly out of a pit, for there was a definite rage burning in the other woman's eyes. Instead she sheepishly nodded and threw the rope on the ground, instead using a spell she usually used on children to make the white animal first rise, then hover over the ground before it slowly flew higher and higher towards her. Morgana followed each of her movements with pursed lips.

Finally, the white and crippled figure of a blue-eyed dragon rose from the Pit, and when its legs touched concrete ground, it let out a whimper as if in pain. Morgana hurried to it and cooed it to calm down, before her icy eyes fell on the scene around them.

Asah followed her gaze and cursed. Hector lay, eyes opened onto nothing, as a pool of blood dried under his body, and the blonde sorcerer was nowhere to be seen. Not far, the clamour of fight was dimming, and the barbarians who had imprisoned the High Priestess were quickly running away at the sight of her free dragon.

With reason. A dying man did not die peacefully as a blazing fire encompassed him the moment the beast - Aithusa, it seemed - caught sught of him. His screams would plague Asah's mind for weeks to come.

The young woman's blood froze in her veins when Aithusa turned to her. But a soothing hand from the dark woman next to her, and the creature bowed down.

"Not her, my friend. She...can be of some use to us yet."


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: Hello readers! I do not know if anyone passed this and read it, but if you did, thank you! I am still in the process of writing this story, it should be about twenty chapters long, and I assure you that from chapter six onwards, it gets quite interesting. ;)_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 3**_

* * *

Days had passed since the Lady Morgana's rescue. The High Priestess had not shown any gratitude towards her followers, and yet, a crowd of at least thirty people, young or not, had decided to follow her and her white dragon to the ends of the Earth.

When they had reached the camp again, news of the many deaths in the druids' ranks had provoked a massive desertion, especially among the elders. Asah had discovered that Kunar had disappeared, as had young Seth and his cheerful cousins.

Among those who had stayed, most were men who were between two ages and who seemed battle-worn. They had bowed before the jet-black-haired woman in deference, and for all acknowledgment, they received a string of orders to father their things and move.

For days they had walked, through wood and plain, through marsh and field. Asah was kept close by the priestess, always in her sight. They had not talked much, but when they did, Morgana was always asking her to do things she was often oblivious to. There was disappointment in the woman's icy stare in those moments, but it could not overthrow the obvious excitement they also displayed.

After six days of wandering, at last, Morgana's words shifted to a more 'companionable' tone. She was standing in front of the fire, Aithusa curled up in a ball at her feet. Most men were away from the scene, in their almost primal fear of the woman they followed.

"Why did you free me?" The voice was soft almost, lacked the usual venom that dripped from her lips.

Asah looked up from her meal - consisting in a piece of bread and a dried stick of meat - and stared blankly at the older woman before answering in an almost shy tone. "Because you are the last High Priestess."

Morgana smirked, and shook her pretty head. "No. I mean you personally."

"Oh." Asah paused, and her pale cheeks took on a rosy tint even as her amber eyes flashed with determination. "I want to learn how to use my magic."

Morgana's eyes flashed a dangerous hue. "And why exactly did you never learn before?"

Asah stood, feeling the need to be on the same level as her somehow-mistress. "Because I have never met anyone powerful enough to teach me. You are the only one. My Lady," she added quickly.

The priestess rounded the fire to stand in front of her, a dangerous smile on her lips. "What about Emrys?"

Asah shuddered. She had heard the name before of course - what druid had not? - but unlike others, it did not bring with it a sense of hope. Quite the contrary in fact. "Emrys has chosen to hide and to protect the Pendragon King. He is a traitor to his own people."

Morgana's smile turned wolfish and her hand shot forward, fingers closing around Asah's wrist in a strangely gentle way. "Asah... I can teach you so many things... "You and I will be great friends."

Asah felt strangely relieved at once. Even the dragon whose deep blue eyes were locked on her could not frighten her anymore. She smiled and placed her hand over Morgana's. Her time had come.

Her lessons began the following day as soon as the sun rose. Eyes flashed gold and rocks and trees alike were given various kinds of treatment until Asah collapsed, tired in a way she had never been before.

Such it went for another two weeks. Before the group marched on again, Morgana taught Asah new and powerful spells. Then they walked until the sun went down. And that's when Morgana and her pupil talked.

"What do you know of Arthur Pendragon?" she asked the first evening of their new-found 'friendship'.

Asah shrugged. "Some among my tribe call him the Once and Future King, think that he will unite us all..." she sneered, "all I know is that he and his father killed countless numbers of my people. And that because of him," her eyes flashed and the fire burnt brighter, "I am in constant fear for my life."

Morgana was pleased at her words. She sat next to her and leaned in as in confidence. "He is my brother, but only by name. He tried to kill me so many times that my bones should already be dust." Her hand closed on Asah's knee. "Would you help me get rid of this bane if we get the chance?"

Asah felt a smile creep on her face. One of those that meant something bad was going to happen. "I would."

Morgana smiled wider yet. "I am glad I met you."

Finally, after almost three weeks of wandering, the High Priestess brought her followers to their new home: an old and mouldy castle partly covered in ivy and whose highest towers had fallen down, crushing one of the wings as it went.

Morgana, with the help of Asah, lit up the wet torches that stood regurlarly in the damp corridors, and Aithusa lit a fire that warmed the massive hall they decided to settle in.

One of the men, upon seeing the coat of arms engraved on top of the mantlepiece, turned to his for now leader, eyes filled with fear. "This place belonged to old kings. It was cursed!"

Morgana's lips turned upright just as she sat, looking more regal than ever, in the throne that lay lonely in the middle of the room. "If you are scared, you need only leave." She pointed at the door, but just as several people turned to glance at it, Aithusa rose, blocking the way and screeching in a way that chilled the bones. No one left.

Asah, feeling curious, rounded the throne and the pedestal on which it stood. There were runes engraved on the stone, sometimes too old to be read, sometimes looking as fresh as if they had been made the day prior.

"What are those?" she asked in a ushed tone.

Morgana's eyes shifted to her and a soft look appeared in her eyes. "They are sigils. Of those who lived and died here. This," she pointed to a rune that displayed a spiral rolling left - a bad omen - that was cleared than most others, "was the sigil of the House Pellès. From which ailed the Fisher King."

Asah nodded. "Then we should add your own, my lady."

Morgana laughed, one of those laughs that was genuine but displayed the deep madness that hid within. "Maybe we should. But then, it would be of no use when I sit on Camelot's throne."

Asah smirked. "Indeed, my lady." She suddenly glared at the men who were still idly looking at their exchange. Her amber eyes flashed gold and one man gripped his throat as if choking. "Do you need us to explain how to settle this place? Work!" She released her prey, who had turned a sickly purplish colour.

Morgana tutted and placed a hand on her arm. "There there, Asah. Ruling by fear demands more subtlety." Asah smirked, and turned to the fire. Time for some practice.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: Hello again! I can see in this story's stats that there isn't a lot of people interested in this, probably because Merlin or Arthur don't feature in the character counts. ;) However, I am also aware of the fact that the story hasn't really kicked off yet. This is why I've decided to post two chapters today, knowing that the action and the main plot starts now._

 _Enjoy! (I hope)_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 4**_

* * *

Asah frightened people. It was a fact. It had started when her powers first manifested, back when she was a happy child with a happy family. But now, now she scared people because of her ruthlessness and cruelty.

In the castle Morgana had chosen as hers, Asah was known as the Torturer. Whenever one of their men refused to obey orders or did not do their job to perfection, she'd creep into the room, eyes flashing gold, and an immeasurable pain would engulf her prey until death followed.

Lady Morgana was pleased of her pupil. She had started to show exactly what she expected to see: no fear, no mercy. Asah knew that neither was needed for the next part of their plan: kill Arthur Pendragon, the traitor King.

"Asah..." came the whispered coo one evening. The young woman was asleep in the room that had been entirely repaired for her, on the big four-poster bed that was now hers. She opened her eyes, and saw her lady sitting next to her on the covers, her alabaster skin shining in the moonlight that erupted from the windows.

"Yes, my lady?" she croaked, sitting up in the bed, fully-clothed in case she was needed.

Morgana smiled down at her with something akin to affection, something that fooled Asah again and again, making her think that she was more than just a pawn in her grand scheme. "We've had bad news."

Asah sat straighter, expecting something like 'King Arthur has found us' or 'Emrys has suppressed all magic' - the latter featured heavily in her dreams, an old man looming over her and taking what made her special, leaving her empty and useless.

She silently waited for the answer, and Morgana put her hand on hers, signalling that pain could come soon. "Your village has been attacked. Everyone is dead."

Asah's heart stopped beating for a second. Her village. Her small, defenceless village. The village where- "Seth?"

Morgana shook her head. "The boy and his family are dead, Asah. The King ordered the executions himself. No exceptions were made."

Asah stood in a second, under the curious gaze of her mentor, a gaze she failed to interpret. Her anger was boiling so hot in her veins that she needed to take it out. She opened her arms wide and screamed, her pain and anger seeping from her fingertips and into the room, breaking furniture, blowing pieces of the ceiling and walls apart, and all the while, Morgana's smirk went unnoticed.

The smirk disappeared as soon as Asah breathed in and her magic was reined in. She was powerful, and she had not yet started to control all of what she could offer, and a trained eye could guess this was exactly what Morgana wanted. The soft and grieving look appeared again on the priestess' features, and she approached Asah, whispering quietly as she comforted the child.

"This cannot last any longer. We've got to act. Are you with me?"

Asah nodded in her mentor's shoulder, her anger so hot still that she suddenly thought that the only person she wished to burn with it was the King.

The following day, Morgana received Asah in her own rooms, which looked regal with the big desk filled with maps and the embroidered beddings. Asah looked at one of the maps, showing the capital, Camelot, and its grounds. Morgana was looking at it intently.

"What would you have me do, my Queen?"

Morgana smiled, as ever she did when her pupil called her by her true title. "Arthur will be mine in the end. But I think we both agree that he has to suffer before being given the right to die." Asah nodded her assent, a cruel smile working its way on her lips. "We need to hurt the people closest to him first.

"His whore wife?" Asah drawled. Morgana had instilled the hate of Guinevere in her veins, and though she had never met the Queen in person, she hated her beyond belief.

Morgana shook her pretty head. "I have a better plan for Gwen. She'll suffer too, and for longer than she'd expect." She paused. "No, I have someone else in mind. Someone who I once thought friend and who tried to kill me."

Asah did not ask who it was yet. Morgana was deep in thought, and she knew from experience that she could not disturb her when she was in this state. Any question about her past was putting her in a rage that meant Aithusa burning someone alive. Or burning Asah's hands before healing them.

She did not care for the lives of their servants, but she knew the pain of dragon fire enough by then to know when to hold her tongue.

Morgana snapped out of her thoughts and looked back at her, anger rising in her eyes. "I want you to kidnap and kill Arthur's manservant. _Merlin_." She spat the name as if a curse.

Asah nodded. She had learnt to hate that name as much as the rest of them. "How?"

"You decide, my pet," Morgana said with a small smile. "But make it painful for both parties involved. Merlin and his beloved King."

Asah's smile turned cruel again, plans of torture drawing themselves in her mind. She had the perfect idea in mind. The boy would last a few hours, but what was left of him afterwards would be sent in pieces to his master. Oh yes, she could see that clearly.

"When do you want me to leave, my lady?"

"In three days' time, I leave for Izmir. I have something to retrieve there. You will leave at the same time." Asah nodded again, her fingertips glowing with unspent magic. Morgana noticed, and tutted. "I told you, child, not to run around having not spent some of your magic! Go, kill someone, blow a wall apart. But do not keep that in."

Asah had become to believe what her mentor told her. She had too much magic in her veins, and she needed to tire it out or she'd hurt herself. Little did she know that Morgana merely didn't want someone more powerful than her around...

But for now, Asah the Sorceress was happy. Because her time had finally come. She'd kill Merlin, manservant to the King, and her Lady would reign. And all would be well...


	5. Chapter 5

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 5**_

* * *

Asah was ecstatic. Her heart was beating so fast in her chest that she was persuaded that her bodyguards could hear it. It didn't please her to show some weakness to those men, but the excitation was too strong, and the mission too important.

Spies had given intel that her target, Merlin, was to accompany some of the Knights of the Round Table on a short journey to Queen Annis' kingdom. Her aim was to kill the boy before he had time to strengthen the diplomatic relations between the two monarchs. Two birds. One stone.

Asah had been sent by her teacher with a very particular goal: kidnap Merlin and give him the slow and painful death he deserved for heaving tried to kill Morgana. Who would herself be away during the whole ordeal, having departed for Izmir in both a mission of her own and a wish not to set eyes on the scum ever again.

Men whispered about fear and weakness. Asah hissed about Priestesses being afraid of naught but annihilation of the Old Religion. They obviously did not believe her, and she punished one rather harshly to prove her point.

Her guard consisted in three men – originally four – whose task was to create a diversion for the Knights while Asah took care of the serving boy.

They had been walking in the forest for hours by then, magic serving as a locating spell to track down their prey. The men were well trained and, since their departure and the loss of their fellow man, they also were adequately afraid of Asah.

She walked in the front, eyes shining gold once in a while to check if they were still on course. She could feel their prey, a group of five, about an hour and a half ahead of them. As expected, they were not riding in a hurry but rather leisurely taking their time. If her magically enhanced ears were anything to go by, they were laughing at some joke.

"Hurry up," she hissed at her guard, "I want this over before nightfall."

One man nodded then turned to the others. Instinctively, when addressed directly by their leader, they had all taken a step back. Asah smirked at the sight, and strode onwards.

These men mattered little to her. They were her pawns to set for her grand scheme. She found herself once again envisioning the torture she'd make her prisoner endure; the beads of blood trickling from his brow; the sweat; the pleading noises; and finally, his last breath. She could envision herself say 'For Morgana Pendragon' before releasing his soul to the Old Gods.

She'd be Morgana's favourite after this. Not even the druid boy she sometimes talked about could possibly do better than her. She'd have avenged their Lady, their Queen. She'd be her champion.

* * *

Finally, Asah and her men reached the "point of no return", the spot where they'd be splitting up to carry their plan out.

Asah raised a hand and reached out with her magic, and as the wave of power surged back to her, her brow furrowed.

"Is there something wrong?" asked one of the men.

Asah almost growled as an answer. Of course nothing was wrong! "One of the Knights seems to be acting as the boy's guard. I shall take them both." She turned to the whole group. "Go."

She didn't have to say it twice: all three of them strode away, doing their part alarming the Knights of their presence. All of them, except the one standing too close to the serving boy. As she had guessed, he stayed there, eyes trailing around in frenzy. His red hair, had Asah paid any attention to names and titles of worthless animals, should have warned her about his identity, but it didn't, and she silently got closer, her golden eyes keeping her magic forward to strike at the most opportune moment.

She reached the edge of the road. She could hear and feel her guard being taken care of by the Knights, and knew she did not have time to think. Her eyes locked onto the red-haired man who had just caught sight of her, opening his mouth in a warning he did not have time to utter. He flew off his saddle and towards a tree that should have killed him.

Except Asah's magic did not work as planned. As soon as the spell was cast, a great force took hold of her, rendering her useless. She could not move, and had no power over her magic. She felt, powerless, the spell being dimmed, and the Knight flew towards the tree at a lesser speed, colliding with the bark with just enough force to make him grunt in pain.

He was trying to get up, using his sword as a support, but Asah still could not move. Her hand remained in the air, and she watched, scared out of her wits, as the serving boy approached her, his eyes flashing a dangerous gold.

The boy had magic?!

Asah tried to hiss, growl, produce any sound at all to warn him about the retribution if he came too close. But then she felt the wave of pure magic over her again, and a booming voice in her mind. "Don't even think about it." There was venom in that voice, and the look on the boy's face gave little of imagination about the owner of the voice.

He raised his hand just a notch, the Knight's grunt merely disturbing him, and Asah felt her body give way. She wanted to sleep badly. She wanted nothing more than to sleep and never wake up.

And just as she fell into the comforting haze of Morpheus, she had the time to silently answer his aggression. "Emrys…" she guessed.

There was no answer. Just darkness.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Hi there! I know there are a couple of people now following this story - thank you so much for liking this enough to be willing to be spammed with emails by me. :D I appreciate it and will make sure you like the rest of this._

 _I have finished writing the whole story yesterday. Meaning this stupid idea of uploading only twice a month has no reason to be anymore. So I'll update each week from now on. And today you get two chapters. Yay! :D Also, this will be 20 chapters long and as much as it's a different take and approach to the series, not really taking part in it but also not being a stranger to it, I'm sure it has its moments. ;)_

 _Enjoy!_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 6**_

* * *

There was no sound, no feeling, nothing, for a while. Asah's mind was somewhere she did not want to leave just yet, some sort of limbo that felt too comfortable and peaceful to go back to a world where she had failed her Lady.

She could not imagine the disappointment on the High Priestess' face when she'd have to give a report of her failure. How she had let the serving boy render her useless as a babe; how she had been nothing better than the scum that had been ordered to accompany her. She could almost feel the dragon fire on her skin, and the phantom pain woke her.

Asah's eyes had not seen light for many a day, although she did not know that yet, and she had to get accustomed to the faint halo coming from a small opening in the wall over her head. She was lying on an uncomfortable pallet, one her back did not really appreciate; and the walls were many of stone, called and wet with whatever humidity there was in the room.

No, it was not a room, she realised when her eyes got sight of the bars making for a fourth wall. A dungeon. A cell.

She had been captured.

Suddenly, her anger rose. The serving boy had dared lay a hand on her, had taken her for prisoner, and now, she was there, treated as nothing more than an animal! She raised her hand to the ceiling, wishing to blow it up, to make as much damage as she could to the place she had been brought to, but found herself unable to.

She stared at her hands blankly. Her magic was gone.

There was a click of metal against metal, and Asah's eyes snapped to the bars. She could sense that there was a door of some sort to the right, maybe leading to the cells. There was the characteristic hiss of an old grate opening, and the hunched form of an old man appeared in sight.

She hissed as she sat straighter. "Who are you and where am I?" she spat with as much strength as she could. Suddenly she felt very weak, her mouth being parched and her stomach growling painfully.

The old man seemed surprised to see her. "I was not aware you had awaken," he said simply before gesturing to the guard at the grate. A young boy with blonde hair appeared, one that surely had been weened by his mother up until a week prior, no doubt. A child.

The old man opened the 'door' to her cell, carrying a plate of bread and a jug of water, a satchel hanging at his hip. Asah eyed him and repeated her questions.

He paused before putting the plate down in front of her, still at a respectful distance. Asah understood that he feared her, and she smirked at that sight. "My name is Gaius. I am the court physician. I was coming to check if you were alright. You have slept for several days."

Asah ignored that information, understanding at once where she had been brought. "I'm in Camelot, then." She huffed. "I won't stay down here for long. My Lady is going to take back what is hers and then I'll make sure you, old man, are given what you deserve."

Gaius – if that was his name – eyed her strangely again. There was silence in the cell for a moment, until he said, as calmly as before: "The King will come to see you shortly. I think you should drink and eat. But slowly, your body as gotten used to nothing." Then he moved to leave, the boy closing the door behind him.

Asah stopped him with a question. "What have you done to my magic?"

The old man did not look back and sighed. "I have done nothing. But it is still there. Barely muted by someone more powerful than you." And he left.

The serving boy. _He_ had done that to her.

Asah turned to the food, ready to give the King a run for his gold when he came to see her. She'd have to prepare her words carefully, to make sure he'd be crushed by fear of his sister, the rightful Queen. He had to cower at the very thought of her, and that'd be Asah's job while she was his prisoner.

King Arthur Pendragon would be her toy.

Except it was not him who paid her a visit first, but a person she had only seen once briefly, someone she had sent flying into a tree, a tree that should have killed him and did not.

The red-haired Knight was standing in front of her cell when Asah looked up from her meagre meal. She stared at him, head slightly tilted to the side. He was wearing a chainmail coat with a belt that both held it together and highlighted the curve of his torso. His hair was longer than short but shorter than long, curling under his ears a bit wildly. And there was his eyes. They were blue, but not a cold blue, rather the colour of the sky in spring; blue with grey freckles in them.

Asah stared and thought the man rather attractive with his jaw covered in a ginger beard. She smirked, thinking that maybe she could trick him into releasing her.

"Not what you expected?" she drawled as silence lingered.

The Knight raised a brow. "No. I was merely curious of what my attacker looked like when awake." Asah huffed, and he carried on. "I am sorry for your current predicament."

Asah felt like laughing. Sorry? He was sorry? Her lips stretched in a smile, but he continued his trail of thought before she could properly be amused.

"It must not be easy for a girl your age to be used as an assassin to a woman who is now disinterested in you. I too would be angry."

Asah stood at his words and rushed to the bars, her face contorted in an ugly look of rage; her golden eyes shining with unspent magic. "How _dare_ you speak thus of my Lady, your rightful Queen?"

The Knight came to stand closer to the bars, closer than anyone with a fear of her would. He was not scared. And it puzzled her, her demeanour shifting a notch. "And where is your _Queen_ right now, young lady? Where is your Lady as we speak? You have been in our custody for near a _week_ , and still there is no sight of a rescue party." His eyes were blazing with anger as well, and Asah understood something that had not come by before. He _hated_ her.

Not that no one had ever hated her before, it had become rather normal since her involvement with Lady Morgana. But no one had looked at her directly and shoved their hatred at her before. And she received the Knight's loathing like a weight on her chest, choking her almost.

She stumbled back into her cell, both under the weight of his hatred and under the other emotion that consumed her: shame. "I failed her…" she repeated until well after the Knight left the dungeons.


	7. Chapter 7

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 7**_

* * *

Time was irrelevant when you were imprisoned. You could, perhaps, make a count of it the first few days, watching for the setting of the sun or its rising; but after a time, it became altogether irrelevant.

Asah had been rotting in her cage for nigh on three months, but she did not know that. During her captivity, she had often been visited by several different people, all of whom she had quickly antagonized. The King, of course, who had come on the second day and who had not come back since; the Queen, twice, to check if she needed new clothes – the dresses she had lent were still lying, unused, on the dirty floor; the old man, Gaius, to check on her health and to require more or less food accordingly; and the red-haired Knight, who was more regularly than the rest coming for the sole purpose of trying to get information out of her.

But not once had she seen the serving boy who had taken from her the only treasure she had ever possessed. She was not sure she could still remember his face. Some nights she could see a mop of jet black hair; some others only bright blue eyes that seeped through her soul; and some nights she could not see at all.

One morning however, things evolved slightly. Not a lot, but slightly.

The red-haired Knight came to 'visit' – if taunting someone for days on end was considered friendly visiting – accompanied with someone else: a dark-skinned boy clad in the same way. He was not holding himself with the same poise as his taller counterpart, and Asah understood that he was one of the low-born Knights the Usurper had knighted a few years prior.

"Oh, are you finally bringing me a torturer, Sir Knight?" she asked with venom.

Neither knew the given name of the other, and it didn't bother either.

He gestured to his companion. "This is Sir Elyan. He has come with me to try and persuade you to…help…us."

Asah stood, approaching the bars like a predator stalking her prey. She was smirking. "Help you? My my, you must truly be desperate to come to me for aid…"

She was glad for a moment that she had managed to wash her dress during the night, using the rain water falling from her small window; but at the same time, she could not understand why she was glad. Had she been stinking like a mere animal, she shouldn't have cared.

The dark-skinned Knight – Elyan, apparently – looked at her from a relative distance. Ah, so _he_ , at least, was scared of her. Good. "Some of our brothers have left several weeks ago to search for your mistress. They have not come back."

Asah grinned, her golden eyes shining with mad glee. "You are worried she killed them!" She laughed, the sound echoing on the stone. "I hope she did! A few less barbarians on this earth!" She made to move back from the bars, but the red-haired one caught to her first.

He moved quicker than she thought it possible, and caught the front of her dress in-between the bars, pulling her harshly against the iron, and face to face with him. If Asah had wished to get away, she only needed to kiss him; they were close enough to each other for that.

"Listen to me, you silly girl," he hissed, "these are my brothers, people I have fought with for years. I trained them, _cared_ for them, and I will not let someone like you tell me they are dead, for they are not. All I need, is the location of your… _mistress_." He spat the word in her face, and Asah, for once, did not retaliate. He had frozen her on her two feet; by his anger, by his strength, and once again, by his loathing.

She took a breath. "I cannot know if your… _brothers_ ," she spat the word as well, "are still alive. But you will not reach my Lady alive. For Ismir is a well-guarded tower and no-one ever besieged it and lived to tell the tale."

The Knight released her, a look of disgust on his face, and he nodded at his friend who nodded back and left the dungeons hurriedly. "I promise you I'll come and tell you the tale. The tale of how we once again defeated the Lady Morgana Pendragon, bane of Albion. I can promise you that, girl." And he left.

Asah had been very close to remind him that she may have been only seventeen, but she was not a girl anymore…

* * *

 _A/N: So the...weird...tension between Leon and Asah was totally unplanned. But apparently she is into tall Captains - as am I. And those two won't start liking each other just yet, believe me._


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: And here comes the next chapter, as promised! Happy Easter everyone! :D_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 8**_

* * *

The Knight did not come back for a while, and Asah found herself counting the days again, until once again time got lost on her. She found herself irritated by that, because she'd have liked to know how long they'd have gone.

She surprised herself by intimately thinking that they'd come back. That they'd defeat her Lady. Some days she found herself even agreeing with he who had become her fiercest enemy: Morgana had not come for her in all the time she had been there. Morgana did not care for her. And she was only starting to understand to which extent this was true.

When her thoughts took that turn, Asah forced herself to remember the fate of her village, and the fate of all who had been there, including poor Seth, barely old enough to ride his own horse. Then her anger rose again, and her loyalty to Morgana flared anew.

Her cell did not give on the courtyard, she had realised early enough, but on the training sand. She could hear, sometimes, the clash of training swords and of chainmail being rammed in; but never the whinny of horses that gave away the return of a party.

Unbeknownst to her, the rescue party to Ismir had returned near on three days before she received her first visitor since _them_.

It was a boy who seemed her age; he had curly dark hair on his head and icy blue eyes. There was a frown on his lips, but somehow, Asah could feel he was not as ordinary as he appeared, despite his knightly attire.

"Who are you, then?" she asked from her perch on the pallet.

He stared at her strangely, then sighed. "Mordred. I am Mordred."

Asah froze, her eyes widening. _Mordred_. That name. She had heard it so many times before. During her childhood; during her time with Lady Morgana; in corridors, hushed by some of the men. Mordred. The druid prodigy, Morgana's protégé and favourite.

And here he stood, clad in the Knights' armour.

He had come to save her.

Asah smiled and approached the bars. "Well then, go on, free me so we can both return to our Queen!" She gestured to the 'door', waiting for it to blast open, but it never happened.

"No," he said simply. Asah's amber eyes snapped to meet his blue ones, and he assessed her before carrying on. "Morgana is not the path. She hurt our people more than you can imagine, Asah."

The sound of her name made her hiss. She had not heard it in a very long time, but she feared he'd give it to the wrong people.

And then she answered. "You abandoned your Lady? You abandoned our cause? And who are you to tell me that Lady Morgana is not the path? Arthur Pendragon is a usurper, unworthy of the throne he sits on; he killed our people; killed _my_ people. I will not defect to _that_ man."

Mordred stood closer to the bars, taking one in his left hand. She noticed his right one tensing at his side, as if twitching to take his sword and slash through her. "You were not supposed to be here. Any other person, the former King included, would have had you executed by now. And yet, you still live. Who do you think ordered that?" He let his words sink in, and carried on. "No one here must know of my previous allegiances. If you divulge it, I promise you, Aithusa's fire will be the least of your worries."

And he, like the others, left.

Asah sat back down on her makeshift bed. What Mordred had told her puzzled her greatly. It was true that the King had not had her killed yet, and for all she knew she had been spending many new moons in that cell. Why hadn't he killed her, a known druid, a known sorcerer? Why had he knighted a known druid as well? If he hadn't killed her, if he hadn't killed Mordred, then could it be that Arthur Pendragon was not the monster she had believed?

Her thoughts shifted once again to Seth and his fate, and she shook her head. No, Arthur Pendragon _was_ a monster. She just didn't put as much force in her hatred as she once had.

Mordred had started to make her doubt.

And later that day, Asah would turn to the dresses the Usurper's wife had brought, and would put her old one to the side, accepting if only for a moment, the kindness of strangers…


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Hi everyone! Sorry for the delay, life has been hectic these past few weeks. Anyway, to make it up to anyone who is still reading this, here are three brand new chapters! I hope you enjoy them! :)_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 9**_

* * *

A few days, or maybe more, stretched on again. Mordred was "visiting" almost every day, standing at the bars and surveying Asah in silence before leaving again. The red-haired Knight had not reappeared, and neither had the old physician.

She was aware of something shifting in the air, as if something important was about to happen. She could hear clamours that had nothing to do with training outside, and when trying to see through the high bars of her prison, Asah could only see columns of servants carrying things around. A feast, maybe, but why?

Had Morgana been defeated? No, if that had been the case, she'd have been told. Someone, more likely her knightly bane, would have basked in her face about Morgana's fate.

Asah looked down at her attire. She had chosen a new dress for the day, and had cleaned up more thoroughly, trying to tie her flaming hair into submission. The dress was a green as spring grass, a soft colour that highlighted the colour of her eyes. She had become thinner, of course, since being imprisoned, and she did not fill the dress as she once would, but the King's wife had given her a belt that she tied as tightly as she could around her skeletical waist.

She was bored, was the truth. At least, if she had had her magic, she could have spent the time practicing. But then again, she'd also have escaped and harmed people along the way. She understood her enemy's motivations a bit better by then. But still, why was she still alive?

One day later, she received an unexpected visitor. The Queen – well, false Queen really – descended the stairs in a simple lavender dress, carrying a basket of well-made food. She was sporting a small smile that unnerved Asah for some reason.

"Good morning," she said with that sickly smile. "I thought you'd like a piece of the feast to come." She gestured to the basket. "It's the King's coronation anniversary today."

Asah nodded stiffly. "And you'd give me some food to celebrate that with you lot." Her voice lacked the venom it once had, and the woman facing her seemed to notice.

"I know your current situation does not show it, but my husband is not a cruel man. He wants you to feel as comfortable as you can be in here until…well, until you can help us of your own volition."

"Ah. So that's what he wants. He wants to tame me."

"No, my dear," the Queen said while putting the basket down, "he wants to make friends with you. And with your people."

Asah's eyes flashed dangerously, but she could not act as she wished to. "Say that to the people of my village whom he murdered without a second thought." And she turned away from the dark-haired woman, eyes squeezed shut to prevent her thoughts from spilling into tears.

There was a silence, then "I don't understand. Arthur has not destroyed any druid's village. In all his reign."

"Are you telling me my Lady, my mentor, my friend, is a liar?"

A sigh. "Darling, you'll have one day to accept that Morgana is not a gentle soul as she used to be. She's turned to herself and her own wishes, no matter who she has to sacrifice in the process. I learnt it the hard way too. She and I…" pause, "she was my dearest friend. And she tried to kill me."

Asah whirled around, noticing the woman's teary eyes but ignoring it. "You stole her crown!"

Another sigh, and the chocolate brown eyes of Guinevere Pendragon met Asah's amber ones. "I was not responsible for the lies Uther gave her all of her life. And I am not responsible for Arthur falling in love with me. I hope you in time understand at least that. Have a nice day."

She turned to leave, and Asah realised that, for some reason, the Ursuper's wife was saddened by the thought of Lady Morgana, and not angered by it. She believed her, if only for one second. "Wait." It was almost a whisper, but the Queen stopped. "I'd very much like something to occupy myself with, if you'd be willing."

There was another pause, and then the two women's eyes met again. A small sad smile appeared on Gwen's lips. "I'll see what I can find."

And Asah found herself thanking the woman she had been told to hate.

Was her fire definitely going out? What was happening to her? These people were lying, the lot of them. They were very good at it too, but they must be lying. There was no other option.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 10**_

* * *

There was some time again before Asah's life changed drastically again.

After the King's feast, she was brought a pile of books along with a leather bound notebook and quill and ink. Asah stared at the pointy end of the quill, thinking the Queen to be stupid to give her a weapon she could escape with, and then pondered.

Since her arrival at Camelot, she had not been tortured. She had not been overly underfed; she'd been given fresh clothes and water to clean herself; and she had been brought something to entertain herself with. The King had been nothing but indulgent to her since he permitted her small self to live and it began to puzzle her more and more now that her stay reached nigh on six months.

The visits were few in-between, and even the traitor Mordred did not come to survey her as he once did; but she found herself longing for the still-eluding serving-boy. The one she had been meant to kill, the one who beat her so easily. Merlin.

She also knew why he was avoiding her. She was a druid, she now knew who he was, and if she ever escaped, she'd surely tell Morgana what she'd learnt. But she wouldn't tell a soul. Because Emrys, for all his cowardice and his treachery, was the most powerful sorcerer in the world, and he'd crush her in his palm.

So she found herself reaching out the way only druids could, were they blessed with magic or not. Her powers might have been harnessed, but she could still converse mentally with her kind. She felt Mordred's pure power nearby – surely training – and kept searching until she found the pulsing fire erupting from her target.

She kept silently whispering " _Emrys… Emrys… Talk to me…_ " but no one answered, leaving her disappointed and tired. She'd try again from time to time, but he'd never answer.

Until one day, the King himself came back to see her, an escort with him.

Mordred was there, as was the Queen and the handsome brown-haired Knight she did not know the name of. Arthur Pendragon was carrying a large coin in his hand, and he showed it to her in lieu of a greeting.

"Do you know what this is?" he asked, not harshly but not nicely either.

Asah smirked. "Good day to you too, Your Majesty." There was a look of surprise between Mordred and the other Knight, and she quickly realised she had been addressing Pendragon with an almost-deference he did not deserve. She got back to her cold composure in no time. "This is the Disir's judgement. You have to answer it."

"So you know of it."

Asah stole a glance to Mordred, who imperceptibly shook his head. "Every druid knows of it. When you receive it, you're as good as dead. If you do not answer it, magic will make sure you die. If you answer it, there's a good chance you'll die even then." Her smirk widened. "I can only guess what your judgement would be, Arthur Pendragon."

"And what would it be?" he asked, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

She gestured around her. "You imprison the Disir's people. You _kill_ them," she added in a growl. "The Triple Goddess will not be pleased." And she turned around, her way of dismissing those who could not be dismissed.

The King sighed, and moved to leave. "Thank you for explaining." And they all left.

Asah only then realised that not once since Mordred had visited her the first time, had someone said her name. Meaning they still did not know it. He hadn't said. She felt lighter for it; and at the same time, she longed to hear her given name again.

And she longed even more for the warmth of the sun on her ever-pale skin…

" _Emrys…_ " she tried again. No answer.

And then Asah also realised that she hadn't once tried to contact she whom she gave allegiance to. She could have. And she hadn't.

And she had no wish to try even then…


	11. Chapter 11

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 11**_

* * *

The evening after the King's visit, Asah had another visit, this time of the Queen alone. She was surprised, because no one ever came to see her after sundown, and because Guinevere seemed to be very aggravated, which in another world would have made her leap with joy.

Instead, she found herself wondering why the kind woman – because she was thus, no need to deny – was looking so sad. She approached the bars of her cell, surprised twice when her visitor gestured to her evening jailor to open the door to her prison.

Guinevere came to sit on a stool that had been installed after Asah had been brought books, and with her came a basket of fruits and bread. "I thought we could have a small collation while talking. I hope you don't mind, I know breaking your diet can be unsettling to your stomach…"

Asah fired a glare at the woman, but upon seeing her bite her lower lip, she tilted her head to the side. Yes, when someone was used as she was to eating a loaf of bread and a meagre piece of meat per day, another rich portion could unsettle her greatly. But she was hungry. So she grabbed an apple and said with some gusto: "I'll take the risk."

She took a bite of the fruit and nearly moaned at the taste. For the King's feast she had been given some chicken and a piece of cake, but she had missed the natural taste of fruit. Simple pleasures, some said.

Silence stretched for a moment during which Gwen stared at her while she ate. She still seemed saddened, but she didn't look to be in a rush to speak either.

"What did you come here to discuss, Ma'am?" Asah finally asked.

She would not, would never, call her Your Majesty, but there was no other word that showed some respect but not too much. The Pendragon wife apparently appreciated her choice, as she smiled a small smile before taking a bite of her own pear. "I am worried. About the Disir and their judgement."

"Aye, and so you should be," Asah snorted before taking another bite. "In my village, two received their judgement and they were both dead within two days."

"What crimes had they committed against your Goddess?"

Asah eyed the woman with some sort of suspicion in her blood. She chose to give her a small lie. "I cannot discuss affairs of the druids with someone who has not been initiated. What I told your husband earlier today is already too much."

But her visitor was much more intelligent than Morgana had intended for her to believe, as she smirked and answered "And you'd face the judgement yourself for Arthur?". She tutted and carried on. "I dearly doubt it." She paused. "If you do not wish to tell me it is alright."

Asah did not answer for another couple of minutes. "The first man killed a Priest. It's a capital offense for my people."

"For mine too," Guinevere quietly interrupted.

Asah nodded once to show her understanding. "The second stole a sacred artefact to sell it." There was an edge of uncertainty as she said those words, and as she did, her eyes glazed. She remembered the day her father had been caught red-handed very well. She had been six and her magic had just started to show. Her father had been whipped on the village's main street, and she had snapped, harming his guards until one was almost choking to his death. Then the Judgement came and her father was killed by a charging boar.

"I am sorry, I did not think before asking. You obviously have bad memories of that time, that was inconsiderate." Asah's eyes snapped to the sovereign's, and she was once again surprised to receive proof of her kind nature.

She cleared her throat. "Anyway, your husband better offer something of importance to the Disir, otherwise it'll be the end for him." She eyed her visitor, realising her coffee-toned skin to become paler, and she changed the subject. "Did he take all his Knights with him?"

"Yes, he did," was the whispered answer.

"Then he should be safe-ish. As long as they can behave, which I cannot be certain of." She chuckled to herself, lifting the mood a notch.

Guinevere was suddenly much happier. "Whatever can you mean? They all are gentlemen!"

"Not the red-haired one! He once tried to choke me!" Asah was still laughing at the air of shock on the other woman's face.

"Can't be! Sir-"

"Sir?! Because that beast has a title?! Oh Mercy!" she was almost doubling over, more amused by her imagining the Knight overhearing their conversation and his more than probable reaction.

Her companion started laughing soon after, until a quiet knocking on the bars signified her need to leave the dungeons. It was already very unusual for a monarch to visit a prisoner at night not to make it last too long…

Guinevere stood and gestured to the basket. "Enjoy the rest of it, you seem to need it." She smiled a bit more sadly than she had a moment before. "And before I leave, I wanted to tell you that I wish I could prove to you that Arthur is not a bad man. If only I knew the name of your village, I could prove he did not destroy it."

Asah hissed a bit, but looked aside, her joyful mood suddenly gone. "I thank you for your wish, but I cannot give it to you. Not yet anyway."

The sharp nod of her visitor told her she understood, and Guinevere Pendragon left the dungeons.

Asah sat staring at the empty stool for a few moments longer, feeling a deep disgust settling in her stomach that had nothing to do with the apple she had just eaten.

She had fraternised with the enemy. Had sat with her, had talked with her, had laughed with her.

And she had enjoyed it.

* * *

 _A/N: This chapter could have been called "If Gwen had a super-power, it'd be to be super-loveable"..._


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: Hi there! Whomever is still reading this, you are treated with three more chapters today, and I hope you like them, 'cause I do! :)_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 12**_

* * *

Asah lost track of time for a bit after Guinevere's last visit. She did not, in all honesty, know when she had last seen the sky and sun with her own eyes. She knew it had been months since, she also knew that her name-day had most likely passed by then, making her one year older. But she started to long for fresh air.

For as comfortable as her dungeon had become, it lacked the sense of freedom that the outdoors provided.

She eyed the small room with a critical eye. Her makeshift bed, once made of a straw mattress and pillow, was by then covered with thick blankets and a linen pillow filled with duck feathers. A small table with a stool served as a desk, paper, ink and quill resting there waiting for her next need to put words down. A pile of books lay beside the bed, some already read, others untouched. There also was another table on which was a copper basin for her to freshen up, a pile of freshly laundered clothes, and a for-now empty tray for her meals.

It looked more like a bedroom than a cell, but there was no mistaking her status: she was a prisoner. The bars that served as her fourth wall made sure she did not forget it, and so did the very small barred window that provided so little light.

Asah sighed and turned away from the sight. She suddenly felt trapped, as if the walls were closing in on her. She put a hand to her chest, feeling something oppressing her there, making it hard to breathe. She focused on her beating heart, knowing it usually calmed down her claustrophobic feats.

She had had those on a regular basis since being first imprisoned, but they had become more and more frequent, and she knew that she needed to get out of there. If only for a few moments.

She promised herself to ask for this small favour next time someone visited her.

That someone was, against all odds, Mordred.

The druid-boy had pointedly ignored her for months by then, his anger with her only fuelled by her stubbornness and harsh words whenever he tried to make her see sense. Asah did not really know why she carried on purposely antagonizing him, though. Her allegiances had started to shift, and if she was still conditioned to believe the Lady Morgana breathed truth and righteousness, she also saw the flaws from time to time.

This time, however, would change her heart forever.

"Good day to you, Sir Mordred," she drawled as he appeared at the bars. She did not know why she still used that cold tone when addressing him, but she did not shift it.

The young Knight sighed and gestured to her guard to open the door and leave them alone in relative privacy. Asah had found that he did that to be able to discuss their shared abilities away from prying ears. She sat down on her bed, curiosity seeping in her veins.

"I've come to discuss an issue."

Asah eyed him as he sat on her stool. He looked tired, with dark circles under his eyes. He also looked as if he had been sick recently, as if his skin was still a bit yellow in places. "What issue?" she asked, her voice a little warmer as she wondered what he had come to talk about.

"Queen Guinevere has been abducted."

Asah did not gasp, did not move a hand to her mouth, but her face effectively lost all colour. She remembered the last time the Queen had visited her, their companionship and their talks that had sometimes made both laugh. She knew, of course, who had taken her, and suddenly, she feared for the outcome. "What would you have me do?"

Mordred seemed surprised at her compassion, but sighed in relief. "Have you got any idea where she'd have been taken?"

Asah thought for a moment, but then shook her head. "You once told me the places I knew as her home were deserted. She never talked of anywhere else." She paused. "You seem unwell, Mordred. What is wrong?"

His greenish eyes met hers and there was the sudden feeling of someone brushing against her mind. She lowered her mental barriers, and then his deep voice was in her head. " _I have been talking to Arthur for a while now. About releasing you._ " Asah could not hide her internal surprise, and he carried on. " _He has, so far, refused. But if you help us. If you pledge your allegiance to-_ "

Asah stood, amber eyes flashing. "Why is it always about allegiances with you people?! Can't I pledge allegiance to myself instead of choosing between one tyrant and my friend?"

Mordred sighed again. " _Morgana is not your friend. She has been using you. And I suspect she intends to use you again._ " His eyes turned harsher. " _I know the Queen has been trying to find proof that your village has not been destroyed by Arthur or his Knights._ "

Asah huffed. " _So far she found none._ "

" _You gave her no name, no place to look._ " He paused, and his gaze turned darker, a feeling of grief washing over Asah as if it had been hers. " _I have been there, once. After._ "

Asah's blood turned cold. " _You saw? You saw Se-._ " She stopped her trail of thoughts, but an image of the boy still got through to the druid.

Mordred stood and came to sit beside her on the bed. " _I wish to show you, if you are willing. It'll be difficult, but you will understand as soon as you share my memories. I cannot forge them, and you will have the proof you need._ "

Asah pondered his offer. He was willing to prove her that Morgana had lied to her, had built her best warrior around a lie. That Arthur Pendragon was not a monster as she had been made to believe. But he also offered to show her the horrors of what her people had been through.

She nodded once. " _I am willing. Show me._ "

Mordred nodded back, and closed his eyes to summon the memory. Asah reached for his mind in return, and closed her own eyes to dive into the blurry scene that started forming in front of her.

At first it was hazy, as if she could only discern colours and shapes, and then, Asah understood: there was smoke everywhere, making it extremely hard to see. She was walking alongside the huts, all burnt to the ground, some still burning. There was no sound in the air, and the memory of a gut-wrenching smell lingered in the air.

Asah lowered her gaze as Mordred had done, and her eyes fell onto the destroyed body of a man she maybe had once knew, but who now was unrecognizable. She felt sick. His skin was melted beyond belief, his bones contorted in fear, his arms frozen where he had tried to protect himself. She could almost hear the scream when he died, and suddenly, it all made sense.

Her village had not been destroyed by Arthur Pendragon.

It had been attacked by a dragon.

Asah opened her eyes and retreated from the memory, reaching for the basin at once so she could render bile and her meagre breakfast into the water. She retched until the memory faded and turned to the boy who was visiting her.

"It cannot be true. I refuse to believe it."

He nodded. "I understand. It is hard to see the truth, but there it is, Asah." She shuddered upon hearing her name again. "Morgana destroyed your village. She manipulated you. All of us, really. And she killed your family. She killed Seth. Not Arthur."

Asah stared at him blankly, and then, she felt something hot, like liquid fire, seeping through her veins and into her bones. Her eyes flashed a dangerous gold, and her lips opened on a deafening cry, but the walls did not shake, the furniture did not fly, the grate did not wrench open.

Her magic was still tamed, but her hatred had now shifted.

She'd get Morgana Pendragon, the lying wench, and she'd make her and her beast pay for what they had done.

If it was the last thing Asah did.


	13. Chapter 13

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 13**_

* * *

Asah stood, facing the wall of her cell, her amber eyes seeing nothing in particular, her hands clenched in fists next to her. She was gritting her teeth, trying to rein in the anger she felt running through her entire body.

Her magic had been unspent for far too long, and it threatened to explode out of her. She needed to make something blow up. Or someone.

Ever since Mordred's revelation, Asah had felt her whole world crumble around her. Her very foundations had been broken down, her convictions proven wrong, her very being proven…false.

Morgana Pendragon had shaped her into a weapon. Had fed her lie upon lie until she was nothing more than a hatred-filled child blindly following the orders of a mad-woman. She had thought the High Priestess to be her friend, her mentor, and now, everything was wrong.

Asah was no longer that girl who had saved the Lady from The Pit. She was no longer the girl who had tortured and killed men whenever she was told to. She was no longer the girl who was happy to kill a serving-boy just because he had harmed her Lady.

For all that she knew, Morgana had lied about that as well.

King Arthur Pendragon had not attacked her village. Queen Guinevere Pendragon was a king and innocent woman. Emrys…Emrys was the most righteous of sorcerers.

And he still refused to talk to her.

One day, though, Asah tried again. She reached out of herself, trying to put as much grief as she could in the words she told the boy named Merlin once she found him in the King's chambers.

" _I know the truth, Emrys. I am sorry I misjudged all of you. Please come see me._ "

She received no answer, but was confident this time it'd work out.

Later, she received another visit. She stood with a smile when she saw Guinevere enter her dungeon, glad to see the Queen safe and sound after her violent abduction and the equally violent death of her brother, the black-skinned Knight she remembered was name Elyan.

She was accompanied by the red-haired Knight, who wasted no time in openly glaring at her and turned to his sovereign before any greeting was uttered. "Are you sure about this, Your Majesty?"

Asah tilted her head to the side, unsure of what he was talking about, but she also noticed the strange smile on Gwen's lips. It was not genuine, she realised, and there was a glint of something unknown in her gaze she did not know what to think of.

"I am sure. Now open this door and let my friend out."

Asah's eyes widened and she moved back, suddenly frightened. "I'm sorry, but are you letting me go?"

The Knight snorted. "No. The Queen wants to take a walk with you. Outside."

Asah glared at him, not even trying to hide her dislike. "It would not be bad if you learnt some manners, Sir Whatever. But I was addressing the Queen."

Guinevere let out a small laugh that sounded wrong and set Asah's blood in alert. "Come now, children, play nice. My friend," she looked at her directly, "would you care for a walk in the park?"

Asah's gaze shifted to her small window, and instead of the claustrophobic feeling that sometimes took hold of her, she felt the opposite fear of open spaces. She shook her head. "Maybe a walk inside would be better. I have gotten used to a small space, Milady. I would not want to faint on your escort here." She glared at the Knight again, but he remained silent, for once.

Gwen seemed pleased with her answer. "Let's go, then."

Asah took a small step outside her cell, glancing this way and that for the first time in ages, and she let out a small laugh. "How long did I spend here?"

The Knight shrugged. "I don't think anyone knows. Near on a year, I'd say."

Asah nodded, surprised at his for once neutral tone. He walked behind her as she followed his Queen, and she took slow steps towards the stairs that would bring her to a new sight.

Camelot truly was magnificent. Asah did not know if it was because she had been living in the dungeons for months, but the light stone with which the castle had been built looked amazing when sun-kissed, and warm to the touch. The halls were delicately decorated, and everywhere screamed of power, wealth, and grandeur.

Her awe must have shown, because after a time, Guinevere laughed again, and again the sound was foreign to Asah's ears. "Dazed, are you?"

She answered with a small nod, and the Queen carried on walking.

Sometimes, Asah would catch the Knight's eye as she looked around. When she felt the first sunray on her skin, she was turned towards him, and when she opened her eyes after enjoying the warmth for a moment, he was staring at her in a strange way.

She also noticed that he looked much more handsome in the light of the sun, his almost orange hair shining like a flame and his blue eyes almost white as he looked at her.

Asah suddenly felt a blush rise to her cheeks and she looked away, unsure as to why she had been having these thoughts in the first place. The Knight hated her, and she hated him too. She had no purpose in finding him handsome. At all.

Guinevere talked about nothing in particular all the time they were walking. Was she aware that Asah was not really listening or did she have something else in mind, though, she'd find out later on.

About an hour in, Asah said she felt ready for some more open spaces, and the Queen lead her outside. It was overwhelming at first, so much in fact that she had to sit down for a few minutes, but afterwards, she quite enjoyed the sights the park gave of the castle itself and of its surroundings.

"Thank you, but I think I'd like to talk with our guest alone for a while."

Asah's gaze shifted to her hostess, and she frowned. Gwen was rarely this dismissive with anyone, and the red-haired Knight himself seemed surprised by her cold tone. He bowed the head, though, and walked away some dozen paces, so he could still see them but not hear what they had to say.

The Queen sat down on a small stone-wall and invited Asah to do the same. Then the look on her face shifted totally, and a grin that looked far too devious to be hers appeared on her lips. She reminded Asah of Morgana on her most cruel days, and she involuntarily shivered.

"Now that we are finally alone, my friend, let's talk about something." She paused, the look in her eyes properly frightful. "I have begun to see the error in my ways, and wish to correct what mistakes I made. I want to kill the Usurper King."

Asah gasped at that, not even trying to hide her surprise and slight disgust at what she was seeing. The image of the sovereign as she visited her that last time, of her kindness and laughter and smiles, when compared to what she had in front of her, left little to imagination.

"You have turned to Morgana's side."

" _Lady_ Morgana," she quickly was corrected, "was my friend long before that fool forced me to marry him. Now I see that. He is to be ended. And I know your allegiances have not changed, so I wish to know if you'll help me."

Asah stared blankly at the woman next to her. She did not recognize the being that was talking. But she was certain of one thing: she was not Guinevere Pendragon, the loving and caring Queen of Camelot.

But if Morgana was behind all this; if she had placed a decoy in lieu of the real Queen; or if Gwen had been turned by some dark magic, Asah could not show that she had changed sides. That right then, the mere thought of Morgana brought such hatred to her veins that she'd have choked the woman to death right there and then.

She glanced at the figure of the red-haired Knight, trying to find out a way of warning him, but thought against it when she realised he would not believe her. She'd have to tell someone else.

So she smiled, trying to put as much mirth as she could in the look, and said "Of course, Milady. Anything to serve the rightful monarch of this land."

What she did not say, however, was who deserved the title in her now convinced heart.


	14. Chapter 14

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 14**_

* * *

It was late that evening when one of Asah's earlier wishes got to be answered. She was back in her cell, the walls of which seemed even smaller when having spent a whole day outside, when the sound of footsteps approached.

She thought nothing of it until she realised that her guards had been relieved for the night.

She turned to the bars of her prison, and her eyes widened, as did her heart, when she saw who exactly was visiting her.

"Emrys…" she whispered.

The young man was still as she had briefly seen on her stupid attack. His jet-black hair was gently curling behind his ears – that were slightly larger than normal – he was wearing the same shirt and jacket; and his blue eyes seemed to bore into her.

"You called," he said, and Asah felt something creep inside her when she heard his voice for the first time.

She nodded frantically. "I did. Something is wrong with Guinevere." She saw the slight surprise in his eyes at her use of the Queen's first name with such familiarity, but carried on nonetheless. "She came to walk with me outside today."

"I know. I made Arthur agree to it."

Asah lost for a moment the trail of her thoughts as one question made its way to the forefront of her worries. "Why did you?"

"Because I believe you have truly changed your ways. I could feel the change in your thoughts when you realised who Morgana really was." He paused. "What changed your mind?"

"Mordred showed me who really massacred the villagers I grew up with."

"Mordred?" There was surprise there, too, and something else Asah could not name. "You said something is wrong with Gwen. Why?"

"She asked me for help. She wants to kill her husband." She too paused for effect more than for anything else. "Do you know what exactly happened to her when she was kidnapped?"

Emrys – or Merlin as he should be called – frowned. "Nothing is sure. There were mandrake roots in the tower where we found her."

Asah shivered again. She remembered what those could make you see. Feel. Do. "Then she is lost. We cannot let her harm the King."

Merlin nodded. "I'll keep an eye on her. If she comes to you for help again, pretend to give her what she wants."

He turned to leave, but Asah stopped him with a gentle hand passed through bars and catching his arm. "Wait! What about my magic? Will you give it back to me?"

He looked at her up and down, and tilted his head to the side. "Not just yet." And then he left.

Asah did not really know what to think about all that. The most powerful sorcerer in the land had come to her willingly, spoken to her, somehow believed her allegations. And even more than that: he had talked to the King in her favour, agreed to let her roam free for a few hours.

Emrys trusted she had really changed sides.

Did it matter so much?

It appeared that it did.

For several days after Merlin's visit, Asah felt herself growing restless. Not knowing what was happening on the surface was growing tiring and extremely frustrating now that she knew that Guinevere had to be stopped.

She found herself feeling for the Queen when lying on her bed awake. The gentle woman had found her way inside her heart in a way that she had not expected, and now she was saddened to think that that woman was gone perhaps forever.

Add to that the fact that she longed to walk in Camelot's corridors once again, maybe even alone, and it can be easily understandable that Asah was progressively losing her mind.

She remembered the chubby man who had been brought to the dungeon one day, accused of having tried to kill the King. He had received many visitors, one of them, the last one in fact, being the Queen. Asah had heard the commotion and the whimpers from her cell, and even if she had seen nothing, the sickening smile of her almost-friend when she passed her cell was unmistakeable.

Guinevere had not asked for her help after that walk in the park, though. She seemed to know exactly what to procure and what to do, and it occurred to Asah that she must have spoken to Morgana who must have wished for her enemy to be the one to deal the last blow to her brother. It must be important for the wicked woman that Arthur would be betrayed by someone he loved rather than by someone who had been rotting beneath his castle for months.

She could not help but see the logic, even if it made her sick to her stomach.

The feeling did not dim when one evening Merlin came back to her, a pained look on his face.

"Do you know how to perform druidic funerals?" he asked, and Asah stood from her bed with a dark look on her face.

"What happened?"

"A young boy, name Daegal, saved my and the King's lives today. He died for it."

"Was she behind it?"

The warlock looked at her for a second. "Without a shadow of a doubt."

Asah cursed aloud, then nodded. "I can perform it. I would not try anything in your presence anyway, it'd be foolish." The small smirk on her lips was more playful than anything, and he nodded with a copy on it on his own lips.

"Good." He outstretched a hand to her door and said " _Tospringe_ " before it creaked open. Asah's eyes widened and she felt excited to witness magic again, especially when it wasn't meant to hurt someone. She wondered if Emrys had books about spells and such that she could borrow, and then she realised the foolishness of her thoughts and followed the sorcerer out sheepishly.

The whole affair was quiet and nice. The young boy – he must not have been much older than fifteen – was laid down in a hole in the ground, and the old physician Gaius said a few words before letting Asah say the formal words. She sent the boy's soul to his forebears; blessed his courage; wished him to live a full life in the next; and she launched a handful of dirt on his body before Merlin raised the pile and settled it over him with his magic.

All was silent until the old man asked "Have you done that often?" and Asah had to look at him.

Her eyes were filled with tears, because of Daegal's age and fate, but also because of her own memories. She nodded. "I've seen it done far too often. And I had to officiate for my father's funeral."

She added no more and the old man seemed to share her grief.

When Merlin closed the door to her cell that night, she asked him for one last favour.

"I'd like to not be kept in the dark in the future. If you don't mind."

She settled for the night, but her thoughts kept going to Daegal's still form and youth, and her hatred once again went to the woman who had broken so many lives, who had killed so many boys and girls who had their whole life ahead of them.

In the quiet of the night, she did not realise when her magic was returned to her…


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N: If anyone is actually reading this story, we are slowly nearing the end..._

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 15**_

* * *

Asah woke up the day after Daegal's funeral feeling like a different woman. She could not pinpoint what it was, but she could feel the difference inside of her, plain as the daylight that tried to make its way inside her cell.

Plain as day was also the Knight standing in front of her cell, a blank look on his face.

Asah stood and greeted him, though she had never seen him before. He was a giant of a man, with cropped brown hair and a chiselled chin. His arms were bare and muscly, and Asah felt like laughing. It was obvious that he was supposed to scare her, but he didn't.

He eyed her for some more minutes, then said "You are to be moved. By order of the King."

Asah's brow furrowed. "Moved? Where, shall I ask?"

"You have apparently proven your worth. In his absence, he asked you be given a room in the castle walls. But you are not to leave it without an escort."

She looked at him, surprised and puzzled. She was still a prisoner, that seemed painfully obvious, but Arthur Pendragon was giving her some sort of comfort? What had she done to prove her worth?

"Can I know to what I owe this honour?"

The Knight shrugged, and it looked as if he could swallow her whole and still be hungry. "Merlin said something to him and he agreed. The rest I don't know."

She knew better than to question this Knight, who seemed built for battle more than thought, and she nodded. "I'm following whenever you are ready."

He lead her upstairs, in a part of the castle she had not yet seen, and stopped in front of an ornate door Asah felt better suited to a princess than to her. When she entered the room, she gaped. It was bigger than her whole house back in the village! The bed in itself would have housed a family of four, and the light entering the room was blinding in its intensity.

She turned to the Knight. "Could I be brought my books, paper and ink, please? I'll feel more at home. I'd also like to thank the King in person, if I may."

Another shrug. "Arthur is gone with his wife, Mordred and Merlin on some errand. I don't know when he'll return. I'll ask someone to bring your things. Don't leave." He closed the door, not locking it, she noticed, and Asah assessed her new home with a new eye.

So the King, his wife and the two sorcerers had left on some secret errand. She could only wish that it meant they had found a way of turning Gwen back into her old self, but nothing was more unsure.

In the meantime, she'd enjoy the big bed, the wardrobe filled with wonderful dresses, the food she'd be brought, and the light of day entering through the huge windows.

Asah moved to one of those and saw that, once again, it gave on the training grounds. But this time, she could see more than hear. She watched as the red-haired Knight appeared to correct some youngster's posture and she found herself enjoying the sight of his bare forearms when he lifted his sleeves, and of the colour of his hair in the sunlight.

She looked away when a blush found its way to her cheeks again.

She should not be attracted to a man like him.

She didn't even know his name…

" _Asah. I need you._ "

Asah sat up in her bed, a cold sweat on her forehead. She searched frantically in the room for the dreaded voice that had sought her out, but found it empty. "Who is it?"

" _You know who,_ " answered the voice in her head. " _Your rightful Queen._ "

" _Morgana,_ " she said, a lump forming in her throat. " _What do you want?_ "

" _Now now, Asah, my dear, I thought you were my friend. My dearest friend even. And here I find you enjoying one of my best rooms and pledging allegiance to my dear brother._ " The voice tutted. " _I am disappointed._ Very _disappointed._ "

"What _do you want?_ " Asah repeated, her teeth gritting.

" _Tell me who Emrys is. I know you know. Tell me, and I'll forgive you. When I attack Camelot, I won't set Aithusa onto you. But only if you tell me._ "

Asah launched all her mental barriers against the aggression and managed to push the woman out of her head. Panting, she looked at her trembling hands.

Morgana had waited more than a year to contact her, and for what? For an information that she'd already have if ever she had been paying attention to those surrounding her.

She would not give her what she wanted, though. Morgana had killed her friends, her family, Seth…she'd pay. Tenfold.

The scorching ire rose in her veins again, and Asah felt it go to her palms in a useless mean to be set free.

She screamed, and a chair flew through the room, crashing into a wall.

Asah stopped screaming, frozen into space. She stared at her hands, then at the chair, then at her reflection in the mirror next to the bed.

She concentrated on the door, and murmured " _Tospringe_ ".

It opened with a 'click'.


	16. Chapter 16

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 16**_

* * *

Asah did not know what to do with the knowledge that her magic had come back to her. Sure, it meant that Emrys now trusted her enough to return it to her, but she still did not know what to use it for.

For most of her life, her magic had been raw, and she had barely managed to control it. Then, she had received the teachings of a woman who taught her to use it for bad things. To harm. To kill. She did not want her magic to be used thus ever again.

But then again, she had never studied it. Nor practiced it with someone like Emrys.

She was confused, and decided to carry on as she had done for the previous year: live without using magic at all. And it happens that that choice would serve her right in the close future.

The following day after Morgana's aggressive contact, Asah found a new Queen standing on her doorstep.

Guinevere was wearing the lavender dress that showed her inner kindness, and no crown or intricate hairdo could be seen anywhere near her. She smiled gently at Asah, and that's when it was made clear that she had been healed.

"You are back!" Asah could not help but say, a hint of relief in her voice.

The Queen launched herself at her, hugging her tight. Asah did not know what to do for a moment, and then she hugged her back, revelling in the feeling of affection being directed at her. She had not felt that since…Seth.

"You helped!" Gwen said as she moved back. "Arthur said you were one of the first to know I had been…changed." She paused and smiled again. "Thank you."

Asah smiled back. "I can honestly say it was my pleasure. And thank you and your husband for these new…quarters," she laughed as she gestured to her surroundings.

Gwen laughed too, and took her arm. "Would you like to walk with me?"

"I'd love to."

There was a lump in her throat as they both made their way to the park, followed by a young Knight she had not seen before. But Asah could not for the life of her understand what it meant.

Little did she know, that the sense of 'wrong' she felt, was not hers, but someone else's. Someone much more powerful than she'd ever be.

Asah and the Queen walked in the park for a good part of the day, only stopping by the kitchens to get some bread and cheese when the sun hit midday. It had been a perfectly normal day, talking, walking, enjoying the company and the fresh air, and Asah forgot for a moment that she was still a prisoner in these walls.

She returned to her chambers when the sun started to set, with a smile on her face and a wish to put down into words what emotions had coursed through her during that day. She had felt extremely peaceful, and it had been perhaps the first time in her life she had ever felt that way.

But as soon as she closed the door behind her, even going as far as to bid her guard a good night, the peacefulness escaped her in angry wisps, being instead replaced by uneasiness and…fear?

There was someone in the shadows of her room, and her magic rose in her veins, preparing to fight whomever Morgana had sent to hurt her.

"I am not Morgana," a voice said from the shadows, and Asah's magic retreated upon hearing Emrys' voice.

She was tempted to ask what he was doing in her rooms, but it would have been vain and pointless. Emrys was far more powerful than her, and as such, she was supposed to worship the ground he walked on. So instead, she asked "Can I help you?" in a sheepish tone that made her internally cringe.

Merlin turned from the window and faced her, his blue eyes shadowed by something she could not pinpoint. He gritted his teeth. "Has Morgana contacted you recently? To…get information?"

Asah froze for a second. Had it all been a sham? Would he take away her magic again if she told him the truth? No, why would he? She hadn't given Morgana anything, after all. She folded her hands in front of her and nodded. "Last night. She…wished…for me to tell her who you were."

"I thought as much." He looked away once more. "She has abducted a very powerful druid. Alator. The name may not be familiar, but he and I met before. He knows who Emrys is. And if she has taken him, I suppose it means you haven't given her what she asked for."

Asah sighed. "I didn't. But you knew that already. You gave me my magic back. Why?"

His blue eyes met her amber ones again. "Because I trust you. I have watched you for a long time, and you have changed. The lost killer Morgana sent us is no more there. I'm glad. I hope you can use your powers for good this time."

Asah, emboldened by his words and also slightly proud of them, took a step forward, then another. "Would you teach me?"

He eyed her strangely, his head tilted to the side. "You have not received any instruction?" She shook her head. "Why ever not?"

"When I was a child, people were scared of me. Being born with magic is rare and frowned upon by druids everywhere." She saw the shift in his eyes, the surprise, the hope, maybe? and she added "My grandmother was a Dragonlord. We think."

Merlin nodded solemnly. He moved away from the window and past her, no doubt to take his leave. "I thank you for keeping my secret. I'm going to try to save Alator. But if I fail, she may try with you again. Be careful. Don't lower your inner barriers." He paused. "I'll bring you a book to study in the morning."

Asah turned to thank him, but he had already gone.

She sat down on her bed after he left, a dumb smile on her lips. She pondered on her situation. She had always wanted to hurt these people, to kill as many of them as possible, because of the errors of their predecessors – because of Uther Pendragon. But now, after months of living among them, of interacting with most of them, she could see that what drove King Arthur and his court was not vengeance of cruelty, but love and respect.

It was such a far cry from what Morgana had taught her, and yet, now Asah could see that she had been manipulated from the moment she had lost her parents, from the moment her mother's counsel had been taken away from her.

The elders had tried to make her see that she would always be in danger as long as a sorcerer did not rule Albion. Morgana had made her think that fear was the easiest way to rule. That killing for a cause was nothing.

And Guinevere with her kind words; Arthur Pendragon with his mercy; Emrys with his trust of her; and even the red-haired Knight with his loyalty; they had all made her beliefs crumble.

Asah glanced as her hands and suddenly, it was as if the blood of all these men she had ended appeared on her palms. She felt a lump form in her throat, and nausea rose to her lips. She started sobbing, trying to wipe the blood off her hands and failing.

She had killed people.

Fathers. Sons. Brothers. Lovers.

She was a monster.


	17. Chapter 17

_A/N: Hello everyone! Here are the next two chapters of this story! There will be only two more, which will be posted next week. Enjoy! :)_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 17**_

* * *

Merlin was true to his word. The morning following his visit to Asah's chambers, she was presented with a parcel containing an old and dusty book.

He had not been disrespectful enough to show her with basic magic spells, instead, choosing to give her a book on healing spells, their consequences, and their intricacy. Asah found the gesture telling: she had harmed the world, had unbalanced it with her transgressions; she'd heal it.

Mordred paid her a short visit that day, a small smile on his lips when he left her to her studies. The young Knight seemed to be happy in these walls, happier than he'd ever been before, as Asah's incursion in his head had proved. She found the fact solidifying her newly-found allegiances.

Merlin's book was extremely interesting, and after a day of refusing to touch anything else than paper, she was done studying it.

Of course, using what she had learnt, however, would require someone to be hurt or sick, and she could not, would not, ask for anyone to be her experiment. More than that, she was still, to anyone else concerned, without magic. And she'd remain so for some time.

Another day passed. Merlin relayed the information that Alator and his apprentice, a woman named Finna, both died protecting his secret. But against all odds, Morgana did not try to contact Asah again. It was puzzling, and a little frightening, as if she had indeed found someone who knew and was willing to tell.

It made her restless at night.

One day later, she found herself wishing to see if what she had been told was true. If she could indeed leave her rooms and go wherever she pleased as long as her guard came with her. She gingerly opened the door that was her sole prison, and peaked outside.

The young Knight of the night before had been replaced with the tall giant whose name eluded her. She nodded at him to greet him, and straightened to pass him as if it was totally normal. He made no move to stop her, and followed her down the corridor at a respectable distance. Asah could not help but sigh in relief. That Knight in particular was putting her on edge. He was so massive, she was so tiny. He could snap her in two using only his pinkie finger.

She laughed at the thought.

He did not catch the humour, fortunately.

Asah's wandering brought her outside, and her ears were at once taken with the sound of swords clashing against one another. She thought that some Knights might be sparring, and her steps brought her to the training pit.

Her eyes widened when she saw exactly who was training.

The King had shed his regal armour and cloak, keeping only his chainmail and belt to protect him from the blows young Mordred was trying to lay upon him. Asah could see that the sovereign was very skilled with a blade, and it was hard for an untrained eye like hers to catch the moves he made on more than one occasion. It struck her at once that he would be a formidable opponent for anyone trying to take him on on the battlefield. She felt relieved at the thought, and then another made its way in her mind.

She could not fight using any kind of weapon. Her sole weapon was her magic, and it was not infallible. She could be struck down by a swordsman as skilled as the King. Easily, even.

And if she wanted to defeat Morgana in battle, she'd need more than magic and wits. She'd need physical strength as well.

So she turned to her guard, who was watching his brothers-in-arms spar, and cleared her throat. His brown eyes turned to her, quizzical. "Pardon me, but do you know anyone who'd be willing to teach me? To…protect me with a blade, that is?"

For a second, it looked as though the tall man might mock her, but he nothing of the sort. Instead, he stared at her blankly for a moment, then quietly said "The Queen. Ask the Queen" before turning back to the spar in session.

Asah pondered his words. Did he mean that Guinevere could find her a teacher? Or that she had to ask permission? Or that Gwen could fight herself? She self-consciously bit her lower lip, and turned to leave the training pit.

She did not check if her guard was following, hurrying back inside with a purpose in mind. She headed straight towards the aisle Guinevere had shown her to be the royal chambers, and stopped in front of what was Gwen's personal office.

She took a deep breath, noticing in the corner of her eye that the tall Knight had indeed followed her, and knocked.

"Come in!" came a few seconds later, and Asah opened the door, letting her guard in behind her. Gwen was surprised to see her and stood from her perch at her desk to greet her. "What a good surprise! Can I help you?"

Asah bit her lip again, and started fidgeting with her hands. She felt like a child ready to ask for something that'd be refused to her. She took a deep breath and relayed her idea and wish to learn how to wield a blade.

At first the Queen was silent. Then she smirked and looked at the tall guard. "That was cheeky of you, Percival. You know Arthur would not approve of me showing any skill with a sword…" She tutted and then laughed.

The man – Percival, then – laughed back, a booming sound that seemed fit to his stature. "You seem to forget, Your Majesty, that when we met, you were indeed wielding a sword. And well, at that."

Gwen laughed again, and then she took Asah's arm in a familiar way. "He is right. It has been quite a while since I last needed to arm myself, but I can teach you the basics. In case you need to protect yourself in the nearby future. But, my husband cannot know."

Asah nodded. "I am quite good at keeping secrets." She smirked, realising then that those people whose secrets she kept were both sorcerers, but her soon-to-be friend did not seem to notice.

"Then let's meet in two days' time. I'll find somewhere to hide and train where Arthur cannot find us. Percy," she turned to the giant man, "make sure you're on watching duty that day, I wouldn't want to explain our predicament to someone like our dear Captain for example." She gave him a knowing look, and he nodded. No need for words.

Asah smiled brightly at that, perhaps more genuinely than anything she had done prior to that moment. "Thank you so much."

"Nonsense. You saved me from darkness, in a way. It's an easy repayment." She linked their arms again. "Now, would you care to accompany me to the kitchens?"

Asah smiled again, and a small chuckle escaped her when Percival opened the door and bowed in a rather mocking way for them to pass.

It appeared not all Knights were as bad as the red-haired one, after all…


	18. Chapter 18

_**Chapter 18**_

* * *

Guinevere managed to give Asah three lessons in sword-fighting before Morgana's plot started showing once more.

All had been calm for about two weeks before word of Saxons attacking small villages in the North and West of the country started reaching Camelot. King Arthur was rather displeased with the news of his sister's latest choice of allies, and more often than not, he was seen riding off with his Knights and Merlin to stop them and save whomever could be saved.

Asah had been offered a training sword, a wooden one, to practice in the safety and privacy of her rooms. Gwen had told her that she needed to train daily until the moves felt easy and natural. So far, she was very clumsy, and her posture was appalling, but she was learning, and found she had growing strength in her arms. She could wave the heavy weapon around much longer than the first time. Meaning, about five minutes.

So it was when she was practicing, waving the wooden toy into the air in a movement that surely did not resemble anything Gwen had shown her, that there was a hurried knock on her door.

In surprise, Asah had just enough time to throw the fake weapon under her bed before the door opened and revealed a dishevelled Mordred.

Asah had not seen the prodigal druid boy alone in a long time. Whether he had lost interest in her since he had successfully managed to make her change sides, or was he just too busy to pay her any kind of attention, she did not know, and did not care in that precise moment, for a wave of worry got hold of her as she made him sit down.

"What's happened?" she immediately asked, thinking of the worst.

His green eyes were red with too much crying, and he shook his dark curls once before answering. "Someone tried to kill Arthur in the woods. She was caught."

"She?" Asah failed to see why he'd cry in such a way, the tough, hardened boy she had come to know. "Do you know her?" she suddenly asked, and was surprised to see him nod.

"Yes. Kara and I, we…we lived together, in the same camp, for some time. She…"

He stopped in his tracks, but the tears and the tone of his voice told Asah all that she needed to know. "She is your sweetheart." He nodded again. "Is she loyal to Morgana?"

"She is. I've talked to her, she refuses to see reason. Arthur says that if she does not back down and see the error of her ways, she'll be…she'll be…hanged." He sobbed at that, and Asah, not knowing which words to use in that moment, chose to pat his shoulder.

After a while, the sobs retreated, and the green eyes turned pleading when they met amber. "Please talk to her. Reason with her. Maybe she'll listen. I don't want her to die. Please."

Asah nodded. "I promise I will try."

The young Knight nodded his thanks, but waited to have rebuilt some sort of countenance before leaving her rooms.

Asah still sat there, puzzled. Shamed, and sad, also. Another druid girl had found herself taken in Morgana's nest of lies, and she could pay it with her life. While Asah had been spared, but why? Because she had not attempted on the King's life directly? Because Merlin had interfered?

She had no doubt that Emrys would be ruthless to anyone who tried to kill his King. So maybe Kara was to be condemned and punished because of it.

She promised herself to visit the girl the following day, and spent the night trying to find the right words.

Kara was a girl about her age, with brown hair and grey eyes, and a pout on her lips. When Asah found her in her cell, she was staring at her hands. Asah recognized the look on her face, and turned to her guard for the day – Percival again – to signify him to leave them in relative privacy. He complied, and her greetings to the girl were "Your magic has been taken away."

Kara's eyes snapped to her, and the pout turned into a snarl. "You are the traitor. The one our Lady calls her Failure."

Asah's eyes widened a bit at that. Morgana was telling her new pupils about her? Called her a traitor? She smirked. "If I ever was a traitor, then it was a traitor to all our best interests." She paused and came to stand by the bars, in a way reminiscent of her earlier visitors back in her cell. "Why did you try to kill the King?"

"I tried to kill a Usurper who kills my people and deems us monsters." There was a hiss in the girl's voice, and Asah wondered for a second if she had sounded like that in the beginning. Perhaps. Most probably, in fact.

"I am a sorceress. And I am alive. How do you think that happened?" Kara stared at her blankly before looking away with a huff, and Asah carried on. "King Arthur granted me mercy. For months, for a year, actually, I fought him and his men, deemed them monsters, killers. Just as my Lady had told me they were. Until…until Mordred proved her wrong."

The girl's jaw set at that, and Asah knew she had hit a chord. "What did he do?"

"He showed me my village. The village my Lady had told me had been destroyed by the King and his Knights. He showed me the dragon fire that had taken it, and the magic that had slaughtered my people." There was an edge of definite pain in her voice, and maybe that's what made the girl look her way again.

There was a silence during which Kara stared at her, assessed her and her words, no doubt. Then she stood, and a snarl was on her lips. "Just because you lost sight of the true cause and decided to whore yourself to the Usurper, does not mean I must do the same." She spat in Asah's face, and went to sit back on her straw mattress.

Asah sighed and wiped the gob of spit off her cheek. "I sincerely hope you see that you are wrong, Kara. And the sooner the better. Not only for your sake, but also for Mordred's."

She left the dungeons with an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

An uncertainty, a hunch, that Kara would not switch sides. That she'd carry on with her ways. And die for it.

If Percival noticed her offness as he followed her back upstairs, he did not say. Asah guessed it was because he himself had other things to think about.

Such as an impeding war.


	19. Chapter 19

_A/N: Hey there! It was about time I put a stopper on this story and gave you the last two chapters... Unfortunately my PC refused to send any files anywhere for a while, so there goes. Late, but here: the end of Traitor._

 _Enjoy!_

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 19**_

* * *

Asah was not surprised when Kara's execution was announced. She was more surprised to hear that Mordred had tried to break her free and had been thrown in a cell for it.

She did not believe that the King would harm the boy he had grown so fond of, but Mordred's heartbreak would have consequences that no one could have seen coming.

The morning after Kara's hanging – which Asah did not attend for obvious reasons – the bell tolled, and the red-haired Knight burst into her room, blue eyes running over each piece of furniture until her found her standing beside her wardrobe in an attempt to find something to wear.

He did not seem ashamed to find her in her nightgown, and she did not make a move to cover herself, instead facing him with the anger of a dragon raging in her veins. Although this time she'd have to be careful, for her magic could indeed harm him and it wouldn't be a good idea.

"What on Earth do you think gives you the right to burst in in such a fashion, Sir?" she asked, her voice almost the perfect mirror of a haughty woman of the aristocracy. That she wasn't, obviously.

He sneered at her. "Checking that you had not run away and kidnapped one of us as you did."

Asah's amber eyes widened. "What complete nonsense are you talking about this time? I knew you weren't bright" – she taunted him – "but that's a first!"

He took step forward, hand twitching over the hilt of his sword, his lips turned into a growl. "Be very careful with your words, traitor." The word, spat as he did, reminded her of Kara, and she calmed down a notch, the girl's fate too fresh in her mind. The Knight seemed to see the change, for he added, in a slightly calmer tone, "Mordred broke out of his cell. I thought you'd taken him and went back to your Mistress."

Asah's eyes bulged again, and she gasped openly. "Mordred…escaped?" She almost stumbled back into bed, a stab in her heart telling her the dread she felt was not to decrease with time. "He joined her. To avenge the girl he loved." Her anger rose again, and she faced the Knight with all her height, which wasn't much but she did not care. "You fools killed her without giving her a chance to redeem herself and now he's gone to Morgana! You've lost him! He's lost himself! You fools! You idiotic, moronic, fools!"

She would have struck him down if he had not caught her wrist in time. They stood there, the tall, too handsome Knight holding her arm while she trembled with anger and grief. He stared at her for a moment more, before moving back and releasing her.

"Don't leave this room. I mean it." And he left, slamming the door shut behind him.

Asah sat down on her bed after that, absent-mindedly rubbing at the red mark that was spreading on her wrist. Mordred had gone. He had switched sides, just as she had once done. Except he had done it for lost love, while she had done it out of spite for the woman who had wronged her so badly.

Mordred had lost a girl he loved, but why change sides? Why go to such a wrong leader? Why go to someone who'd only spread more hatred and grief and death to their land? She did not understand. Then another thought came to her.

Mordred knew who Emrys was.

And the dread in her veins grew and grew, making her skin ice-cold and her magic surge in her like a lion in a cage.

Mordred knew who Emrys was. And he had surely told Morgana by then.

Albion's fate was coming. Fast.

" _Emrys!_ " she called and called during that day. The dread only grew in intensity when she finally found him, in Gaius' office, a place she had not yet seen and did not visit in length when she saw the most powerful sorcerer in the world sitting on his bed, looking utterly defeated. " _Emrys?_ "

He raised his head, eyes red with unshed tears, and shook his head. "She took it." A pause. "My magic. She took it."

Asah's eyes widened. So they had lost Mordred and Emrys in the same day. She felt as though nothing could ever be mended after this day. She had to sit down, choosing a stool on which sat a pile of clothes, and she clutched at her chest. "What are we going to do?" she asked in a small voice.

"I'm going to go to the Crystal Cave to retrieve my magic. It's the only way. And you," he said with a definite and resolute look on his face, "you need to protect Arthur while I'm gone."

She nodded. "Are you sure it'll work?"

"It has to. It's our only chance." He paused again. "Arthur is leaving for Camlann in the morning. If I were you, I'd discuss your going. With him or Gwen. They'll listen."

She nodded, unsure of what to do to comfort the most powerful man in the world. She decided she couldn't possibly hug him, and stood to leave. Just like that. There were no words, no gestures that could possibly comfort him. Not coming from her, a former enemy turned ally who could not even be called a friend.

Asah did not return to her chambers, instead moving to find the King in his own office. That's when she realised she had not had a guard at her door, despite what the red-haired fury had implied. She smirked when she tried to conjure the image of his face when he'd see her out of her rooms. It only faded when she reached the door.

There _was_ a guard there, but he let her in easily, his eyes shadowed by a sort of sadness that could only be called anticipation. Perhaps he was sensing his own ending coming closer every day.

Arthur Pendragon liked to surround himself with a lot of counsellors, she noticed. His Knights, but also his wife and, more surprisingly, the old physician. All turned their gaze to her in surprise when she entered, and Asah felt a small blush rise to her cheeks at the attention.

She also noticed that her red-haired bane stood quite close to his monarch, as if meaning his important position, and the look on his face, although indeed priceless, made her cringe with its intensity.

"Oh," exclaimed Gwen, "I'm sorry, are you looking for me?"

Asah smiled and greeted the woman – her friend, maybe she could be called thus by then – before shaking her head. "Actually, I came to see the King." She turned to said man and bowed her head, a gesture that took all in attendance by surprise. "I was made aware that you are walking to meet with the Lady Morgana for one last battle. I want in."

She had raised her chin confidently upon speaking her mind, aware that appearing weak and submissive would not help her in such a moment. There was a moment of silence during which many assessed her, the Knight who hated her so much glaring at her and no doubt imagining all sorts of means to torture her for her disobeying later on. She smirked at him and the flame in his eyes returned tenfold.

The King cleared his throat and tilted his head to the side. "Well, we shall need all the help we can get, but-"

Guinevere put a hand on her husband's arm with a smile. "Our friend here has proven her value more than once by now, Arthur. Surely you can trust her." But her smile faded somehow as she turned back to Asah. "But I'm afraid I can't help but doubting your use on a battlefield."

Asah smirked confidently again, raising a hand. Her eyes flashed golden, making all in the room gasp in horror as a flame danced in-between her fingers. "I think you'll find I'm not as helpless as I once was."

Arthur, who had put a hand on the hilt of his sword at her display, gritted his teeth. "And when, exactly, has your…singularity…resurfaced?"

Asah shrugged. "I am not sure. But it has and, as you can see, I have no used it against you, Your Majesty."

The red-haired bastard then hissed. "It's a ruse, Sire. She'll turn against you in the middle of the battle, I am sure of it!"

Asah tilted her head to the side, sending a quiet spell towards the offending oaf to pinch him painfully on the backside. He leaped in the air, and she smirked. "If you are so mistrusting of me, Sir Knight, maybe you'll like keeping an eye on me?" She winked in a rather vulgar way, making one Knight – the handsome brown-haired one, apparently – snort.

Arthur pondered for a moment more, and then nodded. "Very well. You can come. But we'll keep an eye on you at all times. You are not to leave your rooms until tomorrow morning."

"Thank you, Sire," she answered, bowing the head as she had previously. She smiled warmly at Guinevere who returned the smile, and exited the room with a sigh of relief.

Nonetheless, that idiotic redhead had almost blow up her carefully thought out plan, and she'd make him pay for it! Dearly!


	20. Chapter 20

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 20**_

* * *

Travelling with an entire army in prevision of a war is an experience that Asah was not ready to repeat any time soon. Although she was not by any means the only female in the group and therefore did not feel any kind of threatened by the men around her, the ambient feeling of "I'm soon going to die" was making her weary.

Guinevere had come fetch her when they departed Camelot, bearing with her items that'd help Asah stay alive in the coming days or weeks. One consisted in a chainmail stopping at the hips, with a tight waistband and tight leather trousers that fitted her like a second skin. Gwen was dressed in a similar way, with a short vest trimmed with fur to keep warm during the nights. Asah was lent a woollen cloak for that same purpose.

Of course, she had not been given any weapons. Not that she needed any, to be honest, her magic having come back full force after her display in front of the King and his Knights. She did not use it a lot, but practiced in the dead of night in her tent, bent on being at her full power when she finally got to face Morgana.

Sometimes she wondered how Mordred felt. If he felt any remorse at having betrayed people who loved him. She hoped he did, for she did not wish to see him dead.

They reached Camlann in a few days. A cold and stony pass in the mountains, icy cold and unwelcoming. Guinevere asked Asah to help her and Gaius set up the medical tent, and two guards were sent to watch her as she helped.

She could still feel the red-haired Knight's glare on her whenever she walked close to the King's party. She wanted to tease him, to taunt him, to make him even angrier, but as she had no reason to and did not know why she wanted to in the first place, she did not.

And her thoughts went to Merlin. She wondered if he had managed to get his powers back. She also heard the King's words, his disappointment, that his servant and closest friend had left him in cowardice, and she wished to tell him, to explain, but knew she couldn't, and it made her even more bitter towards Morgana. She'd have scarred a pure friendship, and it made her want to kill her even more.

Kill.

She wasn't sure she wanted to kill anyone anymore, but when the moment came, she realised she did not really have a choice.

She had been asked to fight in the pass climbing the mountains, while the King and the greater number of his men fought down in the sort of valley formed by the rocks. She had been sent there with the brown-haired Knight and her personal bane, whom she had discovered was the Knights' Captain.

It had been a surprise to find out he was actually quite important in the hierarchy, but it was not changed her feeling of…je-ne-sais-quoi whenever he was close. She did not know if she hated him or liked him; if she wanted to snap his neck of kiss him. And it made her even angrier.

When they reached their battle positions, the Captain turned to his men and placed them into a line, moving rocks to help hinder the Saxons who'd soon be upon them. When he reached her, his blue eyes lacked the flame of hatred they usually held, and he sighed. "Stay back. Throw whatever you wish at them, but do not get close. You're not blade-proof."

Asah smirked at that. "If I did not know better, I'd say you're worried for my safety, Sir Knight."

He huffed and moved to his own position, on the front line, she noticed. So he was not a coward either. Good to know.

At first the Saxons came in small waves. All crashing against a wall of Knights and a wall of fire whenever she felt like it. Using her magic strained her somehow, as if someone was trying their damnedest to stop her using it; and she soon found herself tired.

They had so far lost very few men, while the Saxons all died wave after wave after wave. The scent of burning flesh and of blood spilled made Asah's stomach churn, but she knew it was for the best. She had not fought in far too long, and the prize at the end of this battle – Morgana's death at her end – was too enticing to make her see that they were, in fact, losing. Hard.

A much more important number of Saxons appeared as soon as Asah realised she was too tired to hold her fire-breathing spell. Helped by the eerie shape of a dragon trying to fly above their heads.

"Take cover!" came the Captain's call, but too late for many of their men. Saxons and Knights alike fell to Aithusa's fire, and Asah could do little to help. She could not think of any spell that'd stop a raging dragon, and her memory of the pain she could inflict was distracting her from what was occurring around her.

She was frozen, useless, scared, stupid and useless.

She was waiting for her own deathly fate, for the fire to overtake her, when a dooming voice saved her. She raised her gaze to see the figure of an old man perched on the mountain, a stick in his hand and the dragon tongue on his lips. Aithusa whimpered and retreated, as if wounded, before the figure conjured lightning.

Asah smile. "Emrys…" she whispered. Hope had sprung back into her. They'd be winning, now, Morgana would be defeated, Mordred would be redeemed, all would be well…

A searing pain in her stomach made her lower her gaze, and her amber eyes widened at the same time as the bloodied blade that had pierced her retreated. Her lips opened and she let out a scream, magic seeping out of her and striking the Saxon who had stabbed her from behind.

"Die, traitor!" he spat before being struck down by her magic.

Asah looked dumbly at the wound in her stomach, and the pain turned into fire coursing over her, more painful, even, than Aithusa's. She fell to her knees, all energy leaving her at the same time as the fire ate at her limbs. She could not see the flames, but could see the blood oozing out of her, and she understood then.

She would not get to avenge her village. _Seth._ She'd die before she could confront Morgana.

She had failed.

She let out another cry, fainter, like the wounded animal that she was, until two arms wrapped around her and brought her against someone's chest.

Asah leaned against the man and raised the eyes while the flames consumed her. It was him – the handsome bane of her existence, the red-haired Captain whose name she did not know. She raised a bloodied hand and sullied his cheek and beard as she stroked it.

"I…am…sorry," she managed to croak.

He chuckled darkly. "We are winning." It made her try a smile, because at least they had that, but she felt suddenly so tired, so tired… The flames were calming down, but they were replaced by something worse – cold. She was turning to ice, and it hurt.

She winced. "You don't have to stay here," she panted.

He chuckled again, as if she had said something very stupid, and then turned more serious, his eyes looking almost pained. "I don't even know your name…" he said.

She tried another smile, and though it was weak, it also was beautiful to behold. "I don't know yours."

"Leon. My name is Leon."

Like the lion whose mane he had inherited. She smiled. "Asah."

She winced as another wave of ice overtook her, and she felt like closing her eyes and sleeping. When she'd wake up, everything would be better.

"It was nice meeting you, Leon…" she managed to croak.

Her amber eyes closed, and her breath hitched. She breathed her last, and Sir Leon, Captain of Camelot's Knights, sighed before lifting her body off the ground.

She had just been a girl, but Asah the druid had saved his life and his Queen's, and it was an act he was willing to call heroism.


End file.
